How to be more social?

+80 votes
asked Sep 12, 2015 in Relationships by Phoebe850167 (260 points)
Being antisocial is nothing to be proud of really. I get cut out of normal social activities because I am too nervous to approach other people. In class, I am never the one to speak out and make my voice heard. At work, I am never confident enough to be friendly to my coworkers and go out with them at night. I cannot even voice my grievances to my boss even if I want to. I feel like I am trapped in this antisocial bubble, so much so that I think I was born this way and there is nothing I could do. Is there really any way out?

2 Answers

+14 votes
answered Oct 10, 2015 by BHIMae74058 (380 points)
You should never think that not being social is a genetic flaw. In fact, it has nothing to do with genetics, because it simply involves your personality. Change your personality and see your life include more people, more parties and more social interactions.

Changing your personality is harder than it looks, though. Going from being quiet like a mouse to loud like a bullhorn is not easy. Start by changing your looks and then moving on to the next big step.
+7 votes
answered Oct 5, 2015 by Rosemarie326 (460 points)
Being antisocial has its root in being shy. The chances are that if a person has problems talking to other people, he or she would feel uncomfortable around people and would not know how to react in certain situations. Go to a party and notice all of the wallflowers. They are guaranteed to struggle with shyness more than anything else.

In order to know how to be more social, figure out why you are shy in the first place. Do you have zits? Did you recover from an abusive relationship? Do you think that someone will kidnap and torture you if you say the wrong thing? Usually, shyness is an emotion connected to fear. Program your mind to believe that nothing catastrophic will happen if you get involved with the right people.

Remove the fear that prevents you from being shy. Know that most people are not out to get you. So, stop being paranoid since that is how a lot of shy people are. There is no need to be afraid of other people or what they may think.

Also, avoid trying too hard to impress people. Anyone can see right through you if you do that. You are more likely to fail by trying too hard to succeed! If you make a mistake in public, find a way to get around it quickly. Everyone makes mistakes, so it is not the end of the world. Do not set your standards too high and kill yourself if you do not meet a few of them.
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