How to make yourself look sick

+55 votes
asked Dec 23, 2015 in Education by SammieBell9 (250 points)
I’m having this extracurricular activity at school that I just want to skip! How to make yourself look sick so I have a legit reason to not go to school?

2 Answers

+29 votes
answered Jan 1, 2016 by JoannFrome3 (380 points)

The following methods are originally developed for a school project. While I won’t call them perfected, they should look real enough to fool most untrained professionals from telling that they are fake! Try them, add some of your personal twists to them to make it look more convincing to your family.

(Note that we do not advocate skipping school just because you don’t feel like it. Also the more you sue them, the more likely they will tell that you are faking it)

1. Stomach and clammy hands

Probably the easiest and more effective one to fake sick with, the stomach flu and clammy hands combo will fool most parents from sending their children to school.

Faking a stomach ache pretty much requires acting like you feel agonizing pain from your stomach. Hold your tummy, bend down for the extra dramatic effect and groan every now and then!

For the clammy, uncomfortable sweaty hands, you can easily reach this effect with just licking your plan. Try it now if you want, I won’t judge, but it will look surprisingly convincing. Not only that, you could always “renew” the sweat layer sneakily.

2. Salsa in the toilet

Salsa makes a convincingly graphic puke with just a tablespoon or two floating in your toilet. Those additional veggie chunks give an additional authenticity too.

All you will need is your jar of salsa of choice out of the fridge, into the place of hiding. Make it somewhere in the bathroom you go in the morning and away from where your parents might search anything for. This should avoid you the trouble of sneaking away with the salsa to the toilet the next day.

All you would need to do now is to throw in some of the salsa and enjoy the result of your fake projectile vomit. Who knows, you might contribute to it yourself, it will look pretty nasty. Call your parents and position yourself at the toilet base to pretend you just hurled. Let them marvel at your masterpiece for a second before flushing it down, not like anyone would want to look at it any closer.

3.  The fever

I personally won’t recommend this method. Difficult to execute and also the highest risk, they might send you for a visit to the GP and your cover will be blown.

Make an excuse to go to the bathroom and swish or gargle some warm water for around thirty seconds or so. Flush the toilet, then turn on the water to reduce suspicion from your parents.

Waste no time at all and immediately go for your temperature taking. Your mouth will cool pretty quickly. You might need to practice beforehand to get the right temperature, i.e. around 39 degrees Celsius, for the decently feverish.

If they aren’t watching, you could actually rub the head of the thermometer across your shirt or pants for a few seconds to generate heat from friction. I tried this a few times and manage to break my digital thermometer heat limit, so there is that.

Or you know, your parents could just hold your forehead and compare the temperature with their own, ruining the entire faking thing. Still worth the try if you are desperate.

commented Mar 16, 2016 by bob the builder (230 points)
that is cool thanks!!! lol
+9 votes
answered Jan 6, 2016 by MaryannThomp (360 points)

If you happen to have made up lying around, you could easily make yourself looked really tired or overworked. What you want to aim is to accentuate any features that you usually try to hide. You should end up looking pretty much like an uglier or worse version of yourself, or to most people, a really sick person that should be resting in bed.

Steps:

  1. Use moisturizer on your whole face. This is to create a slightly more glossy, sweaty look that also acts to smudge or thin out some of your makeup later.
  2. With a matte eye shadow, shade a crescent under your eyes and the inner corner. This will really bring your eye bags out
  3. Matte highly right above your crescent to give puffiness to the eyes
  4. With the same shadow, “hollow” your cheeks out, blend into background
  5. With a natural red lip liner, blend the tip of the nose, around the nostrils and down the lower lash line. This will emphasize the existing blemishes and give a look that just screams “blown my nose all day”
  6. To achieve unhealthy, pale lips, simply dab on a little concealer on your lips then blend.
  7. To give emphasis on the sick part of your face, a light matte eyeshadow swept across the cheekbones will complete the sickly pale look. Make sure your chin, nose and forehead remain its sweaty shine

Keep in mind to minimize the product used. You are trying to look as naturally sick as possible after all. In fact, less is more. Aside from the sickly look, you could actually learn which facial feature that you should conceal since this method will bring that negativity to light.

commented Jan 7, 2016 by IsabellePiqu (150 points)
This method looks better for how to make yourself look sick…
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