How to stop being clingy

+23 votes
asked Feb 2, 2019 in Relationships by EstherWickha (230 points)
edited Apr 26, 2019
I am not the easiest person to deal with – I have my demands and I expect them to be met, but who doesn’t? I want to get close to people and know more about them, but they tend to push me away. I do not see myself as being needy or nosy, but that is what people tell me. How do I stop being so clingy?

3 Answers

+26 votes
answered May 31, 2019 by TiffanyMicha (390 points)
edited Jul 20, 2019
The fact is: clinginess extends way beyond infanthood. Every adult has done it at some point in life with a spouse, relative or business partner. Clinginess is simply a form of dependence. So, stop being so dependent on other people! If you are clinging to someone for emotional reasons, such as love or romance, find ways to make yourself emotionally fulfilled.

Focus on loving and romancing yourself instead of clinging to your spouse. Whatever you like to do, treat yourself, whether you like to smell flowers or go out on trips. To stop being clingy means focusing more on yourself and your own needs.
+9 votes
answered May 2, 2019 by HermanX41873 (370 points)
edited Jul 7, 2019
Clinginess is a trait that is common in relationships. You may be a clingy boyfriend who calls the girlfriend if she leaves home for more than 10 minutes. You always accuse her of cheating and expect her to cook, clean and work full time. Or you may be a girlfriend who buys gifts for your boyfriend, expects him to give something in return and scolds him if he does not do his part.

To deal with these clingy tendencies, you need to “un-cling” yourself. Remove your claws from the other person and learn to deal without them. If you do not remove yourself from the situation, you are guaranteed to chase people away.

Once you “un-cling” yourself, focus more on yourself and become less influenced by the other person. If you do not back off and give people their breathing space, you should expect them to cut off ties with you.
+9 votes
answered May 4, 2019 by HenriettaMcc (360 points)
edited May 22, 2019
If you want to know how to stop being clingy, it might be interesting to try to have someone cling to you, so you can better understand how other people feel about your being clingy. Do an experiment with a friend or family member that gives you a taste of your own medicine. See what it is like to have someone cling to you and give demands to you all the time. Then, you will know how annoying it is and see the errors of your ways.

Through this experiment, see your actions through the non-clingy person’s perspective. This way, you are more likely to admit you have a problem.
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